When my wife gets frustrated the little one wasn't sleeping in her own bed, I remind her of basic historical facts and how my in-laws examples aren't a normal one although it seems culturally normal for Americans to not sleep with their toddlers in the same bed:
You’re not wrong — for most of human history, and still today in many traditional societies, infants and young children sleep next to their parents. The “separate crib in a separate room” idea is historically recent, mostly a post-industrial, Western cultural shift. Here are the **advantages** that are usually pointed out for keeping a baby in the parents’ bed (bedsharing) until toddlerhood:
---
## 1. Evolutionary & Historical Norm
* For millennia, human babies were rarely placed alone to sleep. In small bands and agricultural societies alike, mothers and infants shared the same sleeping surface (skins, mats, hammocks, or beds).
* Anthropologists often call humans “co-sleeping mammals” — like primates and many other species, we’re biologically geared for close nighttime contact.
---
## 2. Physiological Regulation
* Babies’ breathing, heart rate, and body temperature tend to sync with their mother’s when close.
* The warmth of the parent reduces energy spent on thermoregulation, which can help with growth and weight gain.
* Exposure to the parent’s breathing rhythm can help regulate infant breathing stability.
---
## 3. Feeding Convenience
* Especially for breastfeeding, proximity at night makes it easier. Mothers often feed half-asleep without fully waking.
* This frequent nighttime nursing helps maintain milk supply and can reduce night-time stress for both baby and mother.
---
## 4. Sleep Quality & Stress Reduction
* Infants often settle more quickly when they can sense a parent’s presence — through warmth, smell, touch, and sound.
* Parents may actually get **more** sleep because they don’t have to fully wake up to attend to the baby in another room.
* Cortisol (stress hormone) levels in infants tend to be lower with co-sleeping.
---
## 5. Bonding & Security
* Constant closeness builds attachment. The baby experiences night as an extension of day: safe, social, and connected.
* Parents may feel emotionally reassured by the immediate awareness of the baby’s well-being.
---
## 6. Developmental Continuity
* In cultures where bedsharing continues into toddlerhood or beyond, children often show less nighttime anxiety and fewer bedtime struggles later.
* Toddlers learn sleep as a social experience, which can support emotional regulation.
---
## 7. Cross-Cultural Confirmation
* Even today, in much of Asia, Africa, Latin America, and Indigenous communities, children normally sleep with parents until at least 2–5 years old.
* The modern Western crib-separation model is unusual historically and globally.
---
### Bottom line
You’re correct: **traditionally, co-sleeping was the human default** — not just until 2 years, but often longer. The shift toward solo sleeping is very recent (about 150–200 years, accelerating with Victorian ideas of independence and modern housing).
Sovereign
npub12y…pqe89
2025-08-23 19:10:51 CEST
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wss://relay.momostr.pinkPublished at
2025-08-23 19:10:51 CESTEvent JSON
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"content": "When my wife gets frustrated the little one wasn't sleeping in her own bed, I remind her of basic historical facts and how my in-laws examples aren't a normal one although it seems culturally normal for Americans to not sleep with their toddlers in the same bed:\r\n\r\nYou’re not wrong — for most of human history, and still today in many traditional societies, infants and young children sleep next to their parents. The “separate crib in a separate room” idea is historically recent, mostly a post-industrial, Western cultural shift. Here are the **advantages** that are usually pointed out for keeping a baby in the parents’ bed (bedsharing) until toddlerhood:\r\n\r\n---\r\n\r\n## 1. Evolutionary \u0026 Historical Norm\r\n\r\n* For millennia, human babies were rarely placed alone to sleep. In small bands and agricultural societies alike, mothers and infants shared the same sleeping surface (skins, mats, hammocks, or beds).\r\n* Anthropologists often call humans “co-sleeping mammals” — like primates and many other species, we’re biologically geared for close nighttime contact.\r\n\r\n---\r\n\r\n## 2. Physiological Regulation\r\n\r\n* Babies’ breathing, heart rate, and body temperature tend to sync with their mother’s when close.\r\n* The warmth of the parent reduces energy spent on thermoregulation, which can help with growth and weight gain.\r\n* Exposure to the parent’s breathing rhythm can help regulate infant breathing stability.\r\n\r\n---\r\n\r\n## 3. Feeding Convenience\r\n\r\n* Especially for breastfeeding, proximity at night makes it easier. Mothers often feed half-asleep without fully waking.\r\n* This frequent nighttime nursing helps maintain milk supply and can reduce night-time stress for both baby and mother.\r\n\r\n---\r\n\r\n## 4. Sleep Quality \u0026 Stress Reduction\r\n\r\n* Infants often settle more quickly when they can sense a parent’s presence — through warmth, smell, touch, and sound.\r\n* Parents may actually get **more** sleep because they don’t have to fully wake up to attend to the baby in another room.\r\n* Cortisol (stress hormone) levels in infants tend to be lower with co-sleeping.\r\n\r\n---\r\n\r\n## 5. Bonding \u0026 Security\r\n\r\n* Constant closeness builds attachment. The baby experiences night as an extension of day: safe, social, and connected.\r\n* Parents may feel emotionally reassured by the immediate awareness of the baby’s well-being.\r\n\r\n---\r\n\r\n## 6. Developmental Continuity\r\n\r\n* In cultures where bedsharing continues into toddlerhood or beyond, children often show less nighttime anxiety and fewer bedtime struggles later.\r\n* Toddlers learn sleep as a social experience, which can support emotional regulation.\r\n\r\n---\r\n\r\n## 7. Cross-Cultural Confirmation\r\n\r\n* Even today, in much of Asia, Africa, Latin America, and Indigenous communities, children normally sleep with parents until at least 2–5 years old.\r\n* The modern Western crib-separation model is unusual historically and globally.\r\n\r\n---\r\n\r\n### Bottom line\r\n\r\nYou’re correct: **traditionally, co-sleeping was the human default** — not just until 2 years, but often longer. The shift toward solo sleeping is very recent (about 150–200 years, accelerating with Victorian ideas of independence and modern housing).",
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