In a surprising reversal, Canada declares the USA Canada's 11th province. In addition to a lightning takeover of federal and state governments, the military, and all major media outlets, Canada declares the Senate and House closed for business and retires all reps and senators. The Canadian government also declares Trump and all his associates (including almost-President Musk) persona non grata, confiscates their assets, and gives them four hours to leave the country after which they will be jailed without bail. The website X vanishes with a sucky gurgling noise leaving only a greasy oil stain behind.
As Americans learn they are now Canadians, wild celebrations spread quickly from sea to shining sea. Mexicans ask, "Y nosotros?" Cartographers see $$$ as they imagine selling new maps and globes to the entire planet. Maine asks to become part of greater Quebec and is accepted with the condition that every student immediately begin learning French. "Pas de problème!" is the reply. Vive Canada!
B Kahn
npub1r7…usag9
2024-12-31 02:38:06 CET
Author Public Key
npub1r7wesu5f6sr5myfdper3u75wf7kw5fwh38d6wnzzwn79akrv33dqzusag9Published at
2024-12-31 02:38:06 CETEvent JSON
{
"id": "888a7604cd54f7b1d6211db4ad2e357a14f2386099af0f3b7ade58aa32c19955",
"pubkey": "1f9d987289d4074d912d0e471e7a8e4facea25d789dba74c4274fc5ed86c8c5a",
"created_at": 1735609086,
"kind": 1,
"tags": [
[
"proxy",
"https://beige.party/users/bkahn/statuses/113744877116737241",
"activitypub"
]
],
"content": "In a surprising reversal, Canada declares the USA Canada's 11th province. In addition to a lightning takeover of federal and state governments, the military, and all major media outlets, Canada declares the Senate and House closed for business and retires all reps and senators. The Canadian government also declares Trump and all his associates (including almost-President Musk) persona non grata, confiscates their assets, and gives them four hours to leave the country after which they will be jailed without bail. The website X vanishes with a sucky gurgling noise leaving only a greasy oil stain behind. \n\nAs Americans learn they are now Canadians, wild celebrations spread quickly from sea to shining sea. Mexicans ask, \"Y nosotros?\" Cartographers see $$$ as they imagine selling new maps and globes to the entire planet. Maine asks to become part of greater Quebec and is accepted with the condition that every student immediately begin learning French. \"Pas de problème!\" is the reply. Vive Canada!",
"sig": "526c3d44634c78a02f8df84ec4e3fd5a5d08866837e18a36193ecd111eca700c87e65e3a45cc0de41a444226a11bfdbab1c815e8db8d1168cb8bf4024c2cc0e9"
}