Nostr notes by NewsThump

NEWS! Goring matadors isn't cruel, it's part of our ...

2026-04-22T11:36:43+02:00

NEWS! Goring matadors isn't cruel, it's part of our culture, insist Spanish bulls https://newsthump.com/2026/04/22/goring-matadors-isnt-cruel-its-part-of-our-culture-insist-spanish-bulls/

NEWS! US doctors defend Trump, "This is how we all dress ...

2026-04-14T09:13:37+02:00

NEWS! US doctors defend Trump, "This is how we all dress now" https://newsthump.com/2026/04/14/us-doctors-defend-trump-this-is-how-we-all-dress-now/

NEWS! Trump declares victory over pants after six weeks of ...

2026-04-09T09:46:00+02:00

NEWS! Trump declares victory over pants after six weeks of shitting in them https://newsthump.com/2026/04/09/trump-declares-victory-over-pants-after-six-weeks-of-shitting-in-them/

NEWS! MAGA determined to celebrate Trump victory in temporarily ...

2026-04-08T13:48:00+02:00

NEWS! MAGA determined to celebrate Trump victory in temporarily returning Strait of Hormuz back to where it was before Trump got involved https://newsthump.com/2026/04/08/maga-determined-to-celebrate-trump-victory-in-temporarily-returning-strait-of-hormuz-back-to-where-it-was-before-trump-got-involved/

NEWS! Parent concerned at time children spend playing computer ...

2026-04-08T12:08:00+02:00

NEWS! Parent concerned at time children spend playing computer games, also quietly grateful for it https://newsthump.com/2026/04/08/parent-concerned-at-time-children-spending-playing-computer-games-also-quietly-grateful-for-it/

NEWS! Oxford English Dictionary redefines ‘Ultimatum’ as ...

2026-04-08T11:08:00+02:00

NEWS! Oxford English Dictionary redefines ‘Ultimatum’ as ‘Word orange lunatic uses when he can’t think of a better plan’ https://newsthump.com/2026/04/08/oxford-english-dictionary-redefines-ultimatum-as-word-orange-lunatic-uses-when-he-cant-think-of-a-better-plan/

"Don't make me repeat myself." - History. Get this ...

2026-04-08T11:03:52+02:00

"Don't make me repeat myself." - History. Get this T-shirt with 20% off AND FREE UK delivery for the next 24 hours only! No code required! Get yours here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/gls62t

NEWS! Man insisting renewable energy is 'too unreliable' ...

2026-04-08T10:05:01+02:00

NEWS! Man insisting renewable energy is 'too unreliable' just going to continue ignoring the whole 'Strait of Hormuz' thing https://newsthump.com/2026/04/08/man-insisting-renewable-energy-is-too-unreliable-just-going-to-continue-ignoring-the-whole-strait-of-hormuz-thing/

If Trump does "kill an entire civilisation" tonight, it ...

2026-04-07T22:56:49+02:00

If Trump does "kill an entire civilisation" tonight, it could do real damage to the long-term validity of the FIFA Peace Prize.

What do you think will be Trump's reaction later when yet ...

2026-04-07T21:25:24+02:00

What do you think will be Trump's reaction later when yet another Iran deadline slides by:

1. Lie, and pretend Iran has been in touch and is 'negotiating the complete opening of the Strait'.
2. Send another wave of bombs and claim Iran has been "totally obliterated", just like their nuclear programme was (until, well, it wasn't)
3. Pretend no such deadline ever existed, claim it was a liberal media lie, and rely on his army of sycophants to back him up.

Or something else?

NEWS! Oil companies to build giant sun blocker after surge in ...

2026-04-07T19:38:10+02:00

NEWS! Oil companies to build giant sun blocker after surge in solar panel sales https://newsthump.com/2026/04/07/oil-companies-to-build-giant-sun-blocker-after-surge-in-solar-panel-sales/

The REAL Trump Delusion Syndrome. Some suffer so deeply, they ...

2026-04-07T17:16:17+02:00

The REAL Trump Delusion Syndrome. Some suffer so deeply, they don't even recognise they're suffering at all...

NEWS! Wireless Festival back on as organisers announce surprise ...

2026-04-07T16:17:28+02:00

NEWS! Wireless Festival back on as organisers announce surprise set from Heinrich Himmler https://newsthump.com/2026/04/07/wireless-festival-back-on-as-organisers-announce-surprise-set-from-heinrich-himmler/

A campaign slogan we can all get behind, surely? Get yours with ...

2026-04-07T14:45:06+02:00

A campaign slogan we can all get behind, surely? Get yours with FREE UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/zVIgdr

From the Archives: Loser nerds waste their time starting funny ...

2026-04-07T13:48:00+02:00

From the Archives: Loser nerds waste their time starting funny little ‘computer’ project in their garage https://newsthump.com/2026/04/07/loser-nerds-waste-their-time-starting-funny-little-computer-project-in-their-garage/ #AppleAt50

NEWS! Donald Trump threatens more sweary words if Iran ...

2026-04-07T10:57:00+02:00

NEWS! Donald Trump threatens more sweary words if Iran doesn't do what he wants https://newsthump.com/2026/04/07/donald-trump-threatens-more-sweary-words-if-iran-doesnt-do-what-he-wants/

NEWS! Why Easter eggs should be part of a healthy balanced ...

2026-04-07T09:55:00+02:00

NEWS! Why Easter eggs should be part of a healthy balanced breakfast, by Jake aged 7 and three-quarters https://newsthump.com/2026/04/07/why-easter-eggs-should-be-part-of-a-healthy-balanced-breakfast-by-jake-aged-7-and-three-quarters-4/

NEWS! Childproof lock added to White House nuclear launch button ...

2026-04-07T08:47:15+02:00

NEWS! Childproof lock added to White House nuclear launch button https://newsthump.com/2026/04/07/childproof-lock-added-to-white-house-nuclear-launch-button-3/

NEWS! What did Jesus do on the Monday, ask those enjoying the ...

2026-04-06T15:09:51+02:00

NEWS! What did Jesus do on the Monday, ask those enjoying the bank holiday https://newsthump.com/2026/04/06/what-did-jesus-do-on-the-monday-ask-those-enjoying-the-bank-holiday-2/

I remember the days when a religious fundamentalist and ...

2026-04-05T21:43:29+02:00

I remember the days when a religious fundamentalist and paedo-enabler threatening to blow everything up before signing off, "Praise be to Allah", would be considered a 'bad' thing...

NEWS! Jesus takes one look at state of the world and walks ...

2026-04-05T15:31:43+02:00

NEWS! Jesus takes one look at state of the world and walks straight back into the tomb https://newsthump.com/2026/04/05/jesus-takes-one-look-at-state-of-the-world-and-walks-straight-back-into-the-tomb/

NEWS! Man who loudly demanded chocolate eggs have ...

2026-04-05T11:50:38+02:00

NEWS! Man who loudly demanded chocolate eggs have 'Easter' written on the box didn’t go to church again this year https://newsthump.com/2026/04/05/man-who-loudly-demanded-chocolate-eggs-have-easter-written-on-the-box-didnt-go-to-church-again-this-year-4/

Everything happens for a reason. A sentiment head daily, but ...

2026-04-04T13:55:03+02:00

Everything happens for a reason. A sentiment head daily, but people often forget the all-important caveat. Get this on a T-shirt with FREE UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/HojiIc

You have to hope that the missing US Air Force pilot hasn't ...

2026-04-04T12:52:03+02:00

You have to hope that the missing US Air Force pilot hasn't been captured by Iran, because Trump is already on record with his thoughts on servicemen who get captured...

NEWS! Galactic Confederation on high alert after moron-infested ...

2026-04-04T12:15:37+02:00

NEWS! Galactic Confederation on high alert after moron-infested planet shows increasing desire to infest other worlds https://newsthump.com/2026/04/04/galactic-confederation-on-high-alert-after-moron-infested-planet-shows-increasing-desire-to-infest-other-worlds/

NEWS! M&S release crossless buns for atheists ...

2026-04-03T15:43:54+02:00

NEWS! M&S release crossless buns for atheists https://newsthump.com/2026/04/03/ms-release-crossless-buns-for-atheists/

Jesus watching you eat a burger on Good Friday. Get your T-shirt ...

2026-04-03T14:03:04+02:00

Jesus watching you eat a burger on Good Friday. Get your T-shirt with FREE UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/RGiva0

NEWS! It would be disrespectful to do any of those little DIY ...

2026-04-03T12:51:00+02:00

NEWS! It would be disrespectful to do any of those little DIY jobs around the house on the weekend Jesus was crucified, insists local man https://newsthump.com/2026/04/03/it-would-be-disrespectful-to-do-any-of-those-little-diy-jobs-around-the-house-on-the-weekend-jesus-was-crucified-insists-local-man-2/

NEWS! Good? I've had better Fridays, insists Jesus ...

2026-04-03T11:46:00+02:00

NEWS! Good? I've had better Fridays, insists Jesus https://newsthump.com/2026/04/03/good-ive-had-better-fridays-insists-jesus-3/

NEWS! "I have to hate Springsteen now, too?" ask tearful ...

2026-04-03T10:43:01+02:00

NEWS! "I have to hate Springsteen now, too?" ask tearful Trumplethinskins, realising all that's left for them is Kid Rock https://newsthump.com/2026/04/03/i-have-to-hate-springsteen-now-too-ask-tearful-trumplethinskins-realising-all-thats-left-for-them-is-kid-rock/

NEWS! 'I bloody hate long haul' - Artemis II passengers ...

2026-04-02T16:49:01+02:00

NEWS! 'I bloody hate long haul' - Artemis II passengers complain as entertainment system goes down https://newsthump.com/2026/04/02/i-bloody-hate-long-haul-artemis-ii-passengers-complain-as-entertainment-system-goes-down/

NEWS! Couple's stand off over who empties the food waste bin ...

2026-04-02T15:55:01+02:00

NEWS! Couple's stand off over who empties the food waste bin enters 176th day https://newsthump.com/2026/04/02/couples-stand-off-over-who-empties-the-food-waste-bin-enters-176th-day/

My species went to the moon, and all I got was this lousy ...

2026-04-02T14:58:03+02:00

My species went to the moon, and all I got was this lousy T-shirt. Celebrate the achievements of Artemis II with the appropriate levels of sarcastic disappointment. Get yours with FREE UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/LfJASG

NEWS! Tesco manager crucified in frozen aisle to prove ...

2026-04-02T14:06:20+02:00

NEWS! Tesco manager crucified in frozen aisle to prove supermarkets are ‘Easter’ enough https://newsthump.com/2026/04/02/tesco-manager-crucified-in-frozen-aisle-to-prove-supermarkets-are-easter-enough/

NEWS! Government surprised to learn you're only supposed to ...

2026-04-02T11:48:21+02:00

NEWS! Government surprised to learn you're only supposed to make things up to trick people on one day of the year https://newsthump.com/2026/04/02/government-surprised-to-learn-youre-only-supposed-to-make-things-up-to-trick-people-on-one-day-of-the-year/

Oh look, the Tangerine Grope Machine did everything he could to ...

2026-04-01T16:11:11+02:00

Oh look, the Tangerine Grope Machine did everything he could to let the "best people" back out into society. Who could possibly have predicted such a thing? Well, apart from EVERYBODY.

This “I Have a Bad Feeling About This” T-shirt is a loving ...

2026-04-01T15:08:03+02:00

This “I Have a Bad Feeling About This” T-shirt is a loving nod to that famously pessimistic line from a certain galaxy far, far away. Get yours with FREE UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/ODBvHA

NEWS! People go back to believing everything they read on the ...

2026-04-01T14:05:26+02:00

NEWS! People go back to believing everything they read on the Internet https://newsthump.com/2026/04/01/people-go-back-to-believing-everything-they-read-on-the-internet-2/

NewsThump Official Statement. You can subscribe here >>> ...

2026-04-01T11:40:27+02:00

NewsThump Official Statement. You can subscribe here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/lcnIol

NEWS! Daily Mail teases readers with fact-based article for April ...

2026-04-01T10:33:43+02:00

NEWS! Daily Mail teases readers with fact-based article for April Fool's Day https://newsthump.com/2026/04/01/daily-mail-teases-readers-with-fact-based-article-for-april-fools-day-2/

NEWS! Labour congratulated on classic April Fool's ruse after ...

2026-04-01T09:11:00+02:00

NEWS! Labour congratulated on classic April Fool's ruse after announcing plan to implement genuinely left-wing policy https://newsthump.com/2026/04/01/labour-congratulated-on-classic-april-fools-ruse-after-announcing-plan-to-implement-genuinely-left-wing-policy/

NEWS! Roberto Di Zerbi appointed Tottenham's new chief turd ...

2026-03-31T22:17:01+02:00

NEWS! Roberto Di Zerbi appointed Tottenham's new chief turd polisher https://newsthump.com/2026/03/31/roberto-di-zerbi-appointed-tottenhams-new-chief-turd-polisher/

International diplomacy at its finest. ...

2026-03-31T16:53:03+02:00

International diplomacy at its finest.

In years to come, when the kids of tomorrow study this time, your ...

2026-03-31T15:47:04+02:00

In years to come, when the kids of tomorrow study this time, your grandkids will determine how dumb you were by seeing how easily you were duped into believing a convicted felon when he told you other countries were to blame for the massive global problems for which he was directly responsible.

The mow must go on. It's getting to that time of year again, ...

2026-03-31T14:53:03+02:00

The mow must go on. It's getting to that time of year again, and the sound of weekend lawnmowers will again be in the air. Get your Freddie-inspired mowing Tee for the lawn-lover in your life with FREE UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/TMhexN

NEWS! US Treasury to push ahead with plan to update dollar bills ...

2026-03-31T13:55:00+02:00

NEWS! US Treasury to push ahead with plan to update dollar bills with signature from Jeffrey Epstein's birthday card https://newsthump.com/2026/03/31/us-treasury-to-push-ahead-with-plan-to-update-dollar-bills-with-signature-from-jeffrey-epsteins-birthday-card/

NEWS! Parents who want LGBT rights classes banned because they ...

2026-03-31T12:53:54+02:00

NEWS! Parents who want LGBT rights classes banned because they are "confusing" somehow fine with algebra https://newsthump.com/2026/03/31/parents-who-want-lgbt-rights-classes-banned-because-they-are-confusing-somehow-fine-with-algebra-4/

NEWS! Man spends entire afternoon trying to get AI to do job that ...

2026-03-31T11:46:00+02:00

NEWS! Man spends entire afternoon trying to get AI to do job that would have taken him 20 minutes https://newsthump.com/2026/03/31/man-spends-entire-afternoon-trying-to-get-ai-to-do-job-that-would-have-taken-him-20-minutes/

NEWS! Travelodge guests to be asked to choose from bowl of key ...

2026-03-31T10:38:46+02:00

NEWS! Travelodge guests to be asked to choose from bowl of key cards https://newsthump.com/2026/03/31/travelodge-guests-to-be-asked-to-choose-from-bowl-of-key-cards/

NEWS! Phillip Schofield to replace Scott Mills on BBC Radio 2 ...

2026-03-31T09:03:51+02:00

NEWS! Phillip Schofield to replace Scott Mills on BBC Radio 2 https://newsthump.com/2026/03/31/phillip-schofield-to-replace-scott-mills-on-bbc-radio-2/

"Wibble". Blackadder's solution to the Western Front, ...

2026-03-30T15:55:06+02:00

"Wibble". Blackadder's solution to the Western Front, and frankly, more coherent than most things that followed. The Blackadder Wibble T-shirt by Happytoast. Organic cotton. Printed in the UK. Get yours with FREE UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/pPXDGo

NEWS! Scott Mills sacked amid Iran spying claims ...

2026-03-30T14:56:00+02:00

NEWS! Scott Mills sacked amid Iran spying claims https://newsthump.com/2026/03/30/scott-mills-sacked-amid-iran-spying-claims/

NEWS! Trump fascinated with Artemis II lunar mission after ...

2026-03-30T13:09:38+02:00

NEWS! Trump fascinated with Artemis II lunar mission after discovering moon has no extradition treaty https://newsthump.com/2026/03/30/trump-fascinated-with-artemis-ii-lunar-mission-after-discovering-moon-has-no-extradition-treaty/

When Dementia Don can't remember which lies he's told ...

2026-03-30T12:24:50+02:00

When Dementia Don can't remember which lies he's told from one day to the next...

NEWS! New Archbishop of Canterbury to wear hazmat suit during any ...

2026-03-30T09:44:01+02:00

NEWS! New Archbishop of Canterbury to wear hazmat suit during any meeting with Pope-killer JD Vance https://newsthump.com/2026/03/30/new-archbishop-of-canterbury-to-wear-hazmat-suit-during-any-meeting-with-pope-killer-jd-vance/

ICYMI: Tottenham Hotspur have sacked Igor Tudor and are looking ...

2026-03-30T08:24:51+02:00

ICYMI: Tottenham Hotspur have sacked Igor Tudor and are looking for a new manager to see them through next season’s inevitable Championship campaign. Read the full story here >>> https://newsthump.com/2026/02/11/spurs-seek-new-manager-ideally-with-efl-championship-experience/

Every now and again, one of our jokes will come true and it will ...

2026-03-29T13:40:07+02:00

Every now and again, one of our jokes will come true and it will look like we can predict the future (we can't, for the record). However, we think this is the first time we've ever had a T-shirt predict the future... Get your Tee HERE >>> https://go.newsthump.com/u0ojTR

Imagine telling people from 250 years ago that the US would still ...

2026-03-29T13:15:33+02:00

Imagine telling people from 250 years ago that the US would still need to be holding "No Kings" protests today...

NEWS! Tiger Woods given FIFA Best Driver award ...

2026-03-28T01:43:10+01:00

NEWS! Tiger Woods given FIFA Best Driver award https://newsthump.com/2026/03/28/tiger-woods-given-fifa-best-driver-award/

BREAKING! A small mistake at the US Treasury... ...

2026-03-27T18:21:55+01:00

BREAKING! A small mistake at the US Treasury...

Gaffer tape: the preferred infrastructure material of DIY ...

2026-03-27T15:27:03+01:00

Gaffer tape: the preferred infrastructure material of DIY enthusiasts, roadies, and anyone who has ever looked at a situation and thought, "If I just don't acknowledge this, it might resolve itself."
Now available as a T-shirt, and with FREE UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/vAo4Ow

NEWS! As Artemis II mission approaches, Trump warns Denmark to ...

2026-03-27T14:25:01+01:00

NEWS! As Artemis II mission approaches, Trump warns Denmark to hand over the Moon or face the consequences https://newsthump.com/2026/03/27/as-artemis-ii-mission-approaches-trump-warns-denmark-to-hand-over-the-moon-or-face-the-consequences/

NEWS! Relief as 'coast to coast' walking trail finally ...

2026-03-27T13:35:02+01:00

NEWS! Relief as 'coast to coast' walking trail finally receives motorway upgrade https://newsthump.com/2026/03/27/relief-as-coast-to-coast-walking-trail-finally-receives-motorway-upgrade/

NEWS! 'Don't think of the UK as unwilling to join your ...

2026-03-27T12:35:01+01:00

NEWS! 'Don't think of the UK as unwilling to join your war, think of it as having bone spurs' Starmer tells Trump https://newsthump.com/2026/03/27/dont-think-of-the-uk-as-unwilling-to-join-your-war-think-of-it-as-having-bone-spurs-starmer-tells-trump/

NEWS! Peace talks progressing well between Donald Trump and his ...

2026-03-27T11:48:16+01:00

NEWS! Peace talks progressing well between Donald Trump and his reflection https://newsthump.com/2026/03/27/peace-talks-progressing-well-between-donald-trump-and-his-reflection/

Trotter's Chandelier Cleaning Company. Est 1982. "A ...

2026-03-26T16:08:49+01:00

Trotter's Chandelier Cleaning Company. Est 1982. "A smashing service, with no catches!" - get your T-shirt with free UK delivery HERE >>> https://go.newsthump.com/8NMAK5

NEWS! Man enters fourth hour watching reels warning of the ...

2026-03-26T15:42:03+01:00

NEWS! Man enters fourth hour watching reels warning of the addictive nature of social media https://newsthump.com/2026/03/26/man-enters-fourth-hour-watching-reels-warning-of-the-addictive-nature-of-social-media/

NEWS! Outrage as Three Lions replaced with Three Beavers on ...

2026-03-26T13:22:27+01:00

NEWS! Outrage as Three Lions replaced with Three Beavers on England World Cup shirts https://newsthump.com/2026/03/26/outrage-as-three-lions-replaced-with-three-beavers-on-england-world-cup-shirts/

NEWS! Who should we believe? The misinformation-loving ...

2026-03-26T11:14:37+01:00

NEWS! Who should we believe? The misinformation-loving democracy-denying religious fundamentalist cult, or the Iranians? https://newsthump.com/2026/03/26/who-should-we-believe-the-misinformation-loving-democracy-denying-religious-fundamentalist-cult-or-the-iranians/

NEWS! Norwich City gain millions more fans after Nigel Farage ...

2026-03-26T09:31:01+01:00

NEWS! Norwich City gain millions more fans after Nigel Farage seen with Ipswich Town shirt https://newsthump.com/2026/03/26/norwich-city-gain-millions-more-fans-after-nigel-farage-seen-with-ipswich-town-shirt/

Needing no roads since 1985. Get this subtle nod to BTTF on a Tee ...

2026-03-25T16:21:03+01:00

Needing no roads since 1985. Get this subtle nod to BTTF on a Tee with FREE UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/m7CPWQ

NEWS! Weary Jane McDonald emerges from HMS Dragon after getting ...

2026-03-25T15:29:43+01:00

NEWS! Weary Jane McDonald emerges from HMS Dragon after getting on wrong ship https://newsthump.com/2026/03/25/weary-jane-mcdonald-emerges-from-hms-dragon-after-getting-on-wrong-ship/

NEWS! 'If only someone had negotiated the end of Iran's ...

2026-03-25T14:22:12+01:00

NEWS! 'If only someone had negotiated the end of Iran's nuclear programme a decade ago' explains smug Obama https://newsthump.com/2026/03/25/if-only-someone-had-negotiated-the-end-of-irans-nuclear-programme-a-decade-ago-explains-smug-obama/

NEWS! Reform councillor’s outrage that dildo packaging ...

2026-03-25T13:21:54+01:00

NEWS! Reform councillor’s outrage that dildo packaging doesn’t even mention Easter https://newsthump.com/2026/03/25/reform-councillors-outrage-that-dildo-packaging-doesnt-even-mention-easter/

NEWS! Donald Trump uses Graceland visit to profess deep ...

2026-03-25T12:35:54+01:00

NEWS! Donald Trump uses Graceland visit to profess deep admiration for how Elvis groomed 14-year-old girl https://newsthump.com/2026/03/25/donald-trump-uses-graceland-visit-to-profess-deep-admiration-for-how-elvis-groomed-14-year-old-girl/

NEWS! ICE agent wondering how many bodies he’d be able to fit ...

2026-03-24T16:13:01+01:00

NEWS! ICE agent wondering how many bodies he’d be able to fit into airport security tray https://newsthump.com/2026/03/24/ice-agent-wondering-how-many-bodies-hed-be-able-to-fit-into-airport-security-tray/

NEWS! Trump holds peace talks with Iranian restaurant ...

2026-03-24T15:11:01+01:00

NEWS! Trump holds peace talks with Iranian restaurant https://newsthump.com/2026/03/24/trump-holds-peace-talks-with-iranian-restaurant/

@nprofile…7z2m It was made internally (we have a few wannabe ...

2026-03-24T14:30:04+01:00

In reply to nevent1q…f36y
_________________________

nprofile1qy2hwumn8ghj7un9d3shjtnyd968gmewwp6kyqpqgpduj2vkd34s7m99dcxe86vj8pkgamvzfvskmm4ac97vywr7fu3qxn7z2m (nprofile…7z2m) It was made internally (we have a few wannabe illustrators here). It's not AI, but it's also not entirely "illustrated". The Taco and chicken were separate vector illustrations we are licensed to use, and they were combined/tweaked for our use. The eyes and hair are the only parts 100% illustrated from scratch by us here, and the text is just a font with outline strokes added (not drawn).

T.A.C.O. Trump Always Chickens Out. Proving it once again in ...

2026-03-24T13:11:04+01:00

T.A.C.O. Trump Always Chickens Out. Proving it once again in Iran. Get this on a T-shirt with FREE UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/rslX9r

NEWS! Men at half-mast to mourn founder of OnlyFans ...

2026-03-24T13:06:47+01:00

NEWS! Men at half-mast to mourn founder of OnlyFans https://newsthump.com/2026/03/24/men-at-half-mast-to-mourn-founder-of-onlyfans/

NEWS! HS2 to save money by replacing trains with handcars ...

2026-03-24T12:18:41+01:00

NEWS! HS2 to save money by replacing trains with handcars https://newsthump.com/2026/03/24/hs2-to-save-money-by-replacing-trains-with-handcars/

Brucey Lee. The Kung-fu comedy crossover we never got to see. Get ...

2026-03-23T17:11:03+01:00

Brucey Lee. The Kung-fu comedy crossover we never got to see. Get your Tee with free UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/LBT527

NEWS! Remorseful right-wing commentators wishing there had been ...

2026-03-23T16:02:23+01:00

NEWS! Remorseful right-wing commentators wishing there had been some sort of clue that Trump was a democracy-denying war-mongering narcissist https://newsthump.com/2026/03/23/remorseful-right-wing-commentators-wishing-there-had-been-some-sort-of-clue-that-trump-was-a-democracy-denying-war-mongering-narcissist/

NEWS! Recognising your own country: A five-point guide for ...

2026-03-23T14:55:58+01:00

NEWS! Recognising your own country: A five-point guide for terminally confused https://newsthump.com/2026/03/23/recognising-your-own-country-a-five-point-guide-for-terminally-confused-2/

NEWS! Priest having second thoughts about letting Trump give ...

2026-03-23T12:50:49+01:00

NEWS! Priest having second thoughts about letting Trump give Robert Mueller’s eulogy https://newsthump.com/2026/03/23/priest-having-second-thoughts-about-letting-trump-give-robert-muellers-eulogy/

The hypocrisy runs deep among the Magaloon community... ...

2026-03-22T17:03:56+01:00

The hypocrisy runs deep among the Magaloon community...

NEWS! ‘Saturday Night Live UK was terrible’ insists man who ...

2026-03-22T16:52:44+01:00

NEWS! ‘Saturday Night Live UK was terrible’ insists man who didn’t bother to watch it https://newsthump.com/2026/03/22/saturday-night-live-uk-was-terrible-insists-man-who-didnt-bother-to-watch-it/

We should be grateful that the Tangerine Grope machine has set ...

2026-03-21T21:21:11+01:00

We should be grateful that the Tangerine Grope machine has set the precedent that it's actually okay to publicly celebrate the untimely demise of people you don't like. It's just a shame he won't be around to see the millions of epic parties that will be held when he eventually shuffles off this mortal coil...

Cereal Killer. What better way to start your day (or end it) than ...

2026-03-21T15:07:26+01:00

Cereal Killer. What better way to start your day (or end it) than by murdering a bowl of cereal? Get yours with FREE UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/KTxkhI

NEWS! Chuck Norris beats the crap out of Satan ...

2026-03-20T16:52:06+01:00

NEWS! Chuck Norris beats the crap out of Satan https://newsthump.com/2026/03/20/chuck-norris-beats-the-crap-out-of-satan/

The news is reporting Chuck Norris has died, but I'd give it ...

2026-03-20T16:29:54+01:00

The news is reporting Chuck Norris has died, but I'd give it a couple of hours to see if the Grim Reaper chickens out and brings him back.

We're sure there are a few tears of frustration being shed ...

2026-03-20T15:44:20+01:00

We're sure there are a few tears of frustration being shed stateside...

NEWS! Half-and-half scarves at football matches to become ...

2026-03-20T14:14:29+01:00

NEWS! Half-and-half scarves at football matches to become criminal offence https://newsthump.com/2026/03/20/half-and-half-scarves-at-football-matches-to-become-criminal-offence/

NEWS! Trump fumes at Japanese refusal to send Godzilla to Strait ...

2026-03-20T09:55:01+01:00

NEWS! Trump fumes at Japanese refusal to send Godzilla to Strait of Hormuz https://newsthump.com/2026/03/20/trump-fumes-at-japanese-refusal-to-send-godzilla-to-strait-of-hormuz/

Politics - the definition. Get yours with free UK delivery here ...

2026-03-19T16:12:09+01:00

Politics - the definition. Get yours with free UK delivery here >>> https://go.newsthump.com/rU5Fla

A summary of the latest news from the Middle East... ...

2026-03-19T13:48:03+01:00

A summary of the latest news from the Middle East...

NEWS! Riyadh named UK City of Culture ...

2026-03-19T12:54:38+01:00

NEWS! Riyadh named UK City of Culture https://newsthump.com/2026/03/19/riyadh-named-uk-city-of-culture/

NEWS! England awarded 1986 World Cup after FIFA overturns ...

2026-03-19T10:04:00+01:00

NEWS! England awarded 1986 World Cup after FIFA overturns Maradona’s handball goal https://newsthump.com/2026/03/19/england-awarded-1986-world-cup-after-fifa-overturns-maradonas-handball-goal/

Seeing a lot of American talking faces making points similar to ...

2026-03-19T09:05:04+01:00

Seeing a lot of American talking faces making points similar to this in the past few days...

NEWS! Trump family curse continues as Trump boys develop bone ...

2026-03-01T11:56:00+01:00

NEWS! Trump family curse continues as Trump boys develop bone spurs in anticipation of war with Iran https://newsthump.com/2026/03/01/trump-family-curse-continues-as-trump-boys-develop-bone-spurs-in-anticipation-of-war-with-iran/