Matt Gemmell 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

People don’t realise that “Just get a Brother laser; it’s fine” is the highest possible compliment for printers. If you want a printer to (1) sit near-dormant in deep sleep for weeks or months on end, and then (2) immediately print what you send to it, properly, every single time and then go to sleep again, then… just get a Brother laser printer. Somehow, in this world of madness, it does the thing you buy it for with no bullshit. If you can even remember what that’s like.

2026-07-06 19:49:26 UTC

When the aliens get here, amidst the ruins they’re going to find a bunch of Brother mono laser printers, still on the included toner cartridge, sitting there on the network ready to roll and wondering why nobody has printed a return label for five thousand years.

2026-06-26 13:13:15 UTC

If anyone still has Flickr Pro, they’re putting the price up by ~25%. Then they do the Adobe thing where they give you 20% off the new price if you try to cancel, which is an insta-cancel from me.
You’re suddenly valuable (valued) when you’re leaving, not when you’re staying, just like in an abusive relationship. 👎 If you’re doing it like Adobe, you’re doing it wrong.
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2026-05-24 16:26:57 UTC

I now have a cheap ThinkPad on the way to use as a Linux experimentation machine. Notwithstanding that such a statement is always a mental health red flag, hey, which distro should I put on it? 🤓

2026-05-23 14:19:10 UTC

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I don't want to be limited by the asahi thing, as cool as it is. Boring old Intel or AMD makes more sense when I want to distro-hop and mess around.

2026-05-23 12:36:40 UTC

Once again toying with the idea of a Linux laptop. Once again bewildered by the hellish PC ecosystem. I should just get a years-old ThinkPad, presumably?

2026-02-09 16:02:05 UTC

RE: https://mastodon.social/@verge/116041069446538092
It has been [5] months since (⚠️ US-based ⚠️, and ⚠️Google Cloud-backed ⚠️) Discord had a data breach which exposed users’ government IDs used for age verification, and now they want everyone to submit to a face scan or to present government ID to verify age? 🤡
#note1w8j…n9tz

2026-02-01 16:32:06 UTC

This piece has been coming for a while, in one form or another. Makes me deeply unhappy to write it. https://mattgemmell.scot/the-fallen-apple/

2026-01-31 17:26:37 UTC

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Put another way, if you had $50,000 in annual disposable income (after tax), Apple’s $1m would be like you donating 4 dollars and 11 cents… and issuing a press release about it.

2026-01-31 15:11:51 UTC

Apple made $117.8bn in total profit (not revenue, of course) over the past four quarters, which is an average of $323 million per day. So when they loudly donate $1m to a charity or a disaster relief fund, they're giving 0.3% of their profits for that single day.

2026-01-18 14:48:19 UTC

Really appreciating these pre-WW3 vibes on a Sunday afternoon. Europe does have the US to thank for somehow uniting the voices of the governments of the UK, France, Germany, the Nordic countries, the Netherlands, the EU council, and the (checks notes) French far-right.
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2025-11-12 11:45:26 UTC

"We care about your face not being punched!" says the mugger, as he makes me choose from "Don't punch my face", "Only punch me in certain circumstances", or the preselected default option of "Punch me right now".

2025-06-21 10:51:13 UTC

Do we know any book cover designers, mastodon crew? Portfolio links appreciated. Thriller genre or adjacent.
#FediHire #GetFediHired ⬅️ Dunno if this is a misuse of those hashtags. Happy to remove if so.

2025-05-30 17:40:18 UTC

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No standard definition, but this works: https://smallweb.page/home

2025-05-30 16:00:53 UTC

More of the small web, please. More charming weirdos doing their own thing and proudly sharing it, regardless of the metrics.

2025-05-20 13:34:53 UTC

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That sounds amazing!

2025-05-19 20:28:02 UTC

Enjoy writing fiction in Markdown, and prefer keeping ownership of your files in the filesystem, but still want beautiful ePub3 ebooks and paperback output? Your uncle Matt feels the same way!
I created a configuration and example project for pandoc, the fab #FOSS markup converter, to produce beautiful novels from your folders full of Markdown files. Lots of booky, novel-y, typographical/layout niceness. I'll be using this with #emacs. 💜
Read all about it here: https://github.com/mattgemmell/pandoc-novel

2024-11-06 13:27:26 UTC

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Similarly, gratitude journaling (write down 3 positive things about each day) has proven and dramatic beneficial effects on emotional health, sleep quality, and a host of other things. This can be begun at any time, takes a minute or two, and is usually best done as part of an evening or pre-sleep routine.
These are concrete, private, achievable actions with virtually no investment needed, and data-backed benefits. That’s all. (3/3)

2024-11-06 13:27:26 UTC

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Expressive writers, as they’re called, are also less likely to experience hypertension, and may have fewer cardiac episodes, and improved antibody response to vaccinations. (For new traumas, waiting a month or two before writing is much better than beginning immediately, in terms of outcomes.) (2/3)

2024-11-06 13:27:25 UTC

I try not to talk about politics as a rule, so here’s an only-tangentially-related thing to think about.
After undergoing trauma (the definition of which is largely up to you), people who write about their experiences — say in a diary — will have higher self-reported wellness and happiness, fewer approaches to doctors short and long-term, and reduced painkiller use. (1/3)

2024-09-30 19:24:22 UTC

Regularly reassess whether your pundits have become apologists.

2024-09-04 19:36:52 UTC

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For what it’s worth, I link to my own site by posting on Mastodon. Full text of the short stories is on my site (and its RSS feed). I also send them out weekly to my newsletter subscribers.
For novels, distribution is via the usual online bookstores, with their own systems for getting a free sample (e.g. Amazon/Kindle, Apple Books).