:neuro: Antonius Marie ⚧

#ActuallyAutistic enby with #ChronicPain. Inspirational butterfly and all around queer (in all the senses of the word!)

pronouns: they/them
alt of: https://wandering.shop/@melindrea
website: https://melindreamakes.art
Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/melindrea

Last Notes

2026-07-02 16:12:02 UTC

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The best I've ever felt was when I was doing a low carb/high fat diet ... but at this point, my spouse and I can't do it, because we don't have the energy it takes. Every single meal and snack needed to be made almost from scratch. You could count on not being able to get anything at restaurant or whatnots that fit that, etc, and don't even think about frozen foods >.<

2026-07-02 15:22:40 UTC

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one of my absolute pet peeves in "budget friendly cooking" is that there are *very* few I've seen that aren't coming from a perspective of privilege.
They go "oh, this meal only costs $5 if we count that you use a tablespoon of milk" ... but you can't buy a tablespoon of milk. You need to buy a whole carton.
They often assume that you have a bunch of things at home already, some decently reasonable (hopefully all have basic salt and pepper), but some that ... aren't (several different types of oil, including olive oil; onions, potatoes, carrots ...)
They go "oh, but you save so much money if you buy dried beans and then cook them yourself!" ... but don't think about the fact that boiling them for a long time takes electricity, and you can't just leave them on the stove while you go out and work to actually make a living.
And that is the final point: saving money by shopping at half a dozen different places (which takes time) and making things from scratch (which also takes time), completely ignoring that a lot of people are poor *despite working far more than full time*. So they don't have the time to do this.

2026-04-28 08:44:32 UTC

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GNU Terry Pratchett

2025-10-25 23:40:02 UTC

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To paraphrase someone clever: We used to believe that Musk was the Henry Ford of his time: a brilliant carmaker. Turns out he was the Henry Ford of his time: an exploitative employer and a nazi

2025-08-24 16:53:07 UTC

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(I'm also currently sitting like that, using my lower leg as the rest for my keyboard <.<)
I did try to get an EDS diagnoses ages ago, but I "fell short" of the criteria, so I'm "only" hypermobile. Which in this case, I'm not too concerned over—half the reason I wanted the diagnosis was so that my niblings wouldn't need to get pain before they could get it ... but none of them are hypermobile. Seriously, there are some ways I can bend *more* than my late teen/early 20s gymnastic nieces ...

2025-08-24 16:49:24 UTC

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I too (as a fat enby in my 40s ...) can put the palms of my hands in the floor with straight legs.
My grandma, in her 90s, could put one foot on the knee of the other leg ...

2025-08-24 16:42:20 UTC

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Yo. My hands aren't super flexible, but most of my other joints are (which has led to pain ... unfortunately including my fingers and wrists)

2025-06-01 23:59:44 UTC

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O.o I remember when he was the "cool astrophysics guy", but would it kill people to actually know the history leading up to their field, at least a bit?

2025-03-17 20:39:21 UTC

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Yeah, there is this ... stereotype/expectation that if you are "smart" you can't be disabled. And if you have "clear signs of disability" (non-verbal, physical issues, whatnot) you *cannot* be "smart"
(to be clear: I'm not putting any value on intelligence here--I'm not "more worth" because of a genetic quirk--but referencing the false belief that smart/disabled are mutually exclusive)

2025-03-17 12:54:38 UTC

I feel like talking about being #ActuallyAutistic
First, I want to make it damned clear that several things can be true at once:
1) Some of me being autistic is 100% an *advantage*
2) I'm still disabled, because there's a lot of it that ... isn't
I'm actually really smart. I can see patterns that a lot of other people can't, and it's served me very well as a developer, because it means I write better code, more readable code, and I have been told on multiple occasions that I'm a dev that people like inheriting projects from. This is part of me being autistic.
I'm a decent writer, and what people compliment me the most on? It's all directly related to me being autistic (how I experience the world with different senses, how I connect things, how I treat words and how important I find the *right* word)
I picked up crochet with lightning speed. Within a month, I could do advanced patterns.
I also tire easily, especially when I need to deal with people.
I am seen as very good at talking (and I am), and I'm the one mainly doing phonecalls at home ... but if I don't know what to expect, I have a *really* hard time doing it. Especially if I've done something they might be chiding me for.
Things needs to be in a very narrow band of "not too challenging, but also can't be easy", or I *can't* do them. Not "doesn't want to". Not "I just need to work through it". Can't.
Starting things? Almost impossible without external urging, and if the urging is too much I'll shut down because it's now too stressful.
And that's why "high functioning" or "Light ASD" or whatever the latest fad for dividing autists into "put in homes" vs "doesn't need help" doesn't work: you can be extremely good in one (or more) parts of life, and still need a lot of help in others.

2025-03-13 22:37:47 UTC

I am once again reminded of one of the culture things that shocked me the most in the US: That "whipped cream" is something you get in a can, and that "fresh whipped cream" is a complicated cooking secret that requires copious amounts of sugar (and vanilla extract).

2025-03-04 10:18:24 UTC

I can't remember where I first saw this, but I love it so much ...
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/114/103/638/553/293/054/original/1ea41c699ed77be7.png

2025-01-02 00:17:25 UTC

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Old movies aren't exactly known for their high quality sound >.>

2025-01-02 00:15:42 UTC

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When we were in France many years ago, my sister was sooo proud over how good her French was, she understood every word the tour guide said! (and then she realised he was in fact speaking English .... just very heavily accented >.>)

2024-11-13 11:12:55 UTC

I'm safe and OK, this is not a subtoot of my current situation (or even necessarily someone else's), but I want to make this clear to everyone:
Depression lies. It's the worst bully you can imagine, who knows all your weak points and who you can't even walk away from, because *it's in your head*. You're not weak, you're not a failure, and you have worth and value because you are you.

2024-09-22 11:53:57 UTC

:autistic_lurker: Yay, new emoji day!
For the times when you can't/don't want to word, but want to let people know that you're here. Like spending a day in the same room with your bestie, without saying another word to them, jut being together.
It's called "autistic lurker" =)

2024-09-07 11:47:11 UTC

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how cute!